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Old 06-05-2013, 04:55 AM
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Default How often do you have 'Couple Time'?

How often do you spend time as a couple without kids and how do you spend that time?
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Old 06-05-2013, 09:46 AM
WhispyWillow
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We usually try to go out every time DH gets home. However now we have a newborn and our baby sitter moved, so it likely won't be as often anymore. Baby stays with me 100% of the time until sometime after one for nursing and stuff.
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Old 06-05-2013, 10:14 AM
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My husband and I were talking about the last time we went out together without the kids and we think it may have been in May of last year. That's the last time we remember being out without the kids, and even then, we went with a group of friends from our church to play at a paintball field, so technically we weren't alone......If you want the last time we did something together, alone without kids we'd have to take it back to March of last year, we got to go watch the Hunger Games together.

It sounds so horrible when I type it out. Usually we get an hour or so together after the kids get to bed, and we usually end up visiting with the neighbors, or watching a TV show/movie together. Before we moved here to SC ( almost a year ago) all our time in Massachusetts my husband wasn't home. So, having him home at 6 every day he works and him having days off is like a miracle after living the way we did for three years. I guess that's why it doesn't seem so bad that we never go out together.

My in-laws will be visiting in August, so, that will be the next time we'll have an opportunity to go out together.
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Old 06-05-2013, 02:02 PM
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CareyGreen CareyGreen is offline
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My wife and I have found (and always counsel other couples) that this has to happen on some level every day.

Yep, every day.

We have planned a time that fits our schedule every morning, which has to flex from the school year to the summer, but nevertheless it's a top priority. The kids know about it and have gotten used to us spending time together talking and praying every day. The older ones help out with the younger ones when needed. Without that daily time we each get stuck in our own heads and our own experiences - and make a ton of assumptions about each other as a result. Our daily times help us stay connected with each other in an understanding way that facilitates healthy communication in the household.

Beyond that we try to do an official "date" every week.
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Old 06-05-2013, 02:07 PM
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We are blessed that our DD is a pretty good sleeper, she goes to bed around 10pm every night. So we stay up for half an hour or so together, we usually eat ice cream and watch some TV together. We like to go on dates, though haven't been on one since before DD was born in January. (I nurse and she eats every 3 hours.) But we usually try to go on a date every other month or so.
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Old 06-05-2013, 04:49 PM
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I think the frequency of "couple time" changes as the children get older. Since mine have been old enough to babysit themselves we go out 2-3x/month. It's not always a dinner out. Sometimes it's a local cafe for soup and a sandwich, coffee, and/or (just) dessert.

Time for the just the two of us is something I really look forward to. I love the opportunity to reconnect with my hubby w/o interruptions.
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Old 06-05-2013, 09:27 PM
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We are fortunate that our kids go to bed by 7:30 so we do get time in the evening together although DH or I was normally busy a couple of nights a week and often we are both tired so just want to relax.

On the weekend we got to walk hand and hand down a beach for about 10 mins while the kids were playing behind us it felt like we were a no kids couple again for those 10 mins. We could hear the kids so knew all was fine.

Now they are both at school it does make it easier. I have once gone and had lunch with DH.
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Old 06-06-2013, 05:47 AM
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We think couple time is one of the most important things we do as parents/spouses and we try to make it happen every day. Most days its a movie or tv show and treats (Ice cream or cookies or something) for a couple hours after the kids go to bed at 8. Sometimes we play games, on the Wii or board hames like backgammon or chess or scrabble. When its not too cold outside dh lights a fire in our firepit in the backyard and we sit outside and chat and roast marshmallows. In the winter he will sometimes light one in the fireplace and we move the couch and sit in front of it and either read seperately and talk about what we are reading or we might read to each other. Some days if dh goes to work a little later we spend our time in the mornings, laying in bed and talking and snuggling much later than normal. There are of course other things that happen in bed, usually at night before sleep but we try to sneak that in at random times when we can. We also have a planning meeting once a month to go over the schedule and budget for the month. And we also try to have a date night once or twice a month. Once is usually dinner and once is just coffee or dessert. After that we might go look around a bookstore or go shopping for something we've been wanting. One time we bought a box of ice cream and ate it in his truck and talked. Time with dh is one of the best parts of my day! :Wub: Now, it does look a bit different right now because we have a newborn and I'm exhausted all the time. But this is temporary; just a few more weeks probably.
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Old 06-06-2013, 06:29 AM
justinapeterswv justinapeterswv is offline
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I suppose with my daughter being only ten months old we can relate to those with very little couple time because of nursing, etc. We are pretty good about going to church events (weekly group, service, etc.) without the kid, but that's obviously with friends and others and the only reason we can do that is because our church has an awesome kids program and reimbursement for childcare for events that they don't offer it. Actual alone time is probably only once every other month or so when we can get a grandparent and enough stored milk and all the other logistics work out too.

Wish it was more, maybe that's something we need to work on...

Justin Peters
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Old 08-10-2014, 09:11 PM
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